Review: A Roll of the Dice
A Roll of the Dice by Tymber Dalton
My rating: 4 of 5 stars
Women interested in kinky sex and have a vanilla husband, this is the book for you. Ms. Dalton is one of the best writers when it comes to an accurate portrayal of the BDSM lifestyle. In a roll of dice, I can totally relate to this book.
Jenny and Mike have been married for a long time. While they still love each other dearly, sex is sort of blah. Jenny's interest in sex is roused when she reads a kinky book in her book club.
Jenny wants to explore the lifestyle and lucky for her, one of the women in the book club lives it. Excited, she drags her reluctant husband, Mike, to a munch. The munch is more eye opening than Mike expected. Specifically, Mike encounters a person whom he works with and it goes a bit downhill from there.
As one of the main moderators for the largest BDSM group on Goodreads, this story is all too familiar to me. Ms. Dalton does an excellent job of capturing the desires of a woman wanting more in her sex life and not sure how to explain this to her husband. Jenny's journey into kink is tentative. The method she introduces BDSM to her husband is very similar to how I recommend for newbies. What Ms. Dalton adds is the husband's perspective. For women who are wishing their husbands would be able to dive into the deep end of kink as masterful dominants, this book is a must read. This will give a wife's insight into her husband's reluctance.
Mike is a man most can relate to, even my husband. He is a man who is confident at work and loves his wife. He is also raised to never hit a woman. Mike's personal history with an abused mother makes him even more wary of BDSM when it comes to impact play. As a woman, it is very hard to understand why a man can't use a flogger, paddle or cane to hit a woman when she wants it. Seeing it from Mike's point of view, I finally understand even if I don't agree with it.
On top of Mike's hesitation with hurting his wife, he is afraid of disappointing her. How could he disappoint? By not being a perfect male dominant in the BDSM romance stories. This is the key for women who want a sexual dominant husband to understand. With how first world Western society currently raise boys to men, being sexually aggressive is a no-no. To expect men to be both sensitive to a woman's needs and be physically dominant, it's a lot to ask for. Just as many women mistakenly think they understand what it means to be a submissive by reading erotic fiction.
The reality of a D/s relationship with its ups and downs is perfectly captured in this story. Ms. Dalton does a great job of showing how Jenny pushes too hard, which makes Mike take a few steps back away from BDSM. Mike's concern with how this lifestyle is wrong is changed by being around everyday people, some of them his friends. This is another key which helps bring Jenny and Mike closer to the D/s dynamic Jenny yearns to experience. Ms. Dalton peppers this story with helpful gems of knowledge I hope readers pick up.
"Remember that if you aren't having fun with it, you're doing it wrong." (pg. 54)
I can't emphasize this enough. There is no one true way. Every relationship is different and what is fun for one may not be fun for another. This point is to illustrate a couple's need to both enjoy and have fun; otherwise, why would they continue? Mike and Jenny experiment and it's so good to see how they find their rhythm.
Lastly, I'm wondering if Ms. Dalton may know who I am or perhaps this is more common than I thought. I'm glad I'm not the only one who shares an Amazon account with my husband. My husband does do what Mike did.
"They [Mike and Jenny] shared an Amazon account, so it'd be easy for him to pull Jenny's books up on his phone or tablet app without even having to ask her about them. (pg. 54)
Why is this important? Because a husband can learn a lot about what his wife's desires are by reading through the books she loves to read. He'll be able to pick up what arouses her and then they can discuss and come up with scenes which work for them. This is a great suggestion in the book without coming across as a teaching lesson or a lecture.
There are many little tidbits in this story which I can easily relate to, which makes this book more meaningful to me. Between the D&D gamers, vanilla spice husband and reference to GoodReads groups, I'm totally engrossed and engaged.
This book is highly recommended as a Gateway to BDSM book. Another winner from Ms. Dalton.
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